The Choices We Make

The Choices We Make

“Children are messengers from a world we once

deeply knew, but we have long since forgotten.”

Alice Miller

 

Wholesome environments are creative, playful, natural, inspiring, relaxing, and educational.  They are sanctuaries where natural conversation, wonder, and curiosity abound.  According to research, when children Have been asked, “What makes this home a space that is happy?” their answers are usually about simple every day events or interactions.   Rarely have children mentioned exotic trips, large houses, or designer clothing.  Instead, we may hear, “When I come home, my mom hugs me a lot.  That’s when I feel happiest.”  As one nine years old replied, “I like it when we cook something yummy together and the house smells delicious.”  Or from the mouths of babes, “I like it when my dad throws me up in the air and messes my hair.”  Consider asking your children that question, their answers may surprise you.

 

“The best inheritance a parent can give to his or

her children is a few minutes of time each day.”

A. Battista

 

Children crave relationships with adults that make love connections with them.  These love connections are a time to hit pause, be in the moment and engage your child’s heart, no matter how busy the day can be.  Here are a few ideas to consider:

 

• Stop all activity and look directly into your child’s eyes and say “I love being your parent and watching you grow. You amaze me!”

 

            “I enjoy how often I laugh when I am with you.”

 

            “You inspire me with your kindness.”

 

            “I will be here for you no matter what.”

 

            “You have what it takes to make your dreams come true.”

 

• Dance and sing together.

 

• Create a special song for your child, either an original piece or by putting your own lyrics to an existing song.

 

Amazing Kendall, how sweet the sound.

Your name fills us with glee!

Your spirit kind, your words profound,

A gift for all to see!

 

• Create special moments such as lighting a candle while eating dinner.

 

• Appreciate beauty, simplicity and celebrate the arts.

 

• Pamper one another by painting nails, having a bubble bath or playing hairdresser.

 

• Read together.

 

• Act out imaginary characters by walking funny, talking funny, or making hilarious comments.

 

• Hide notes of affection around the house and give clues as to where the notes are hidden so children can find them.

 

• Co-Author a Family Celebration Book by taking turns adding to the story line.

 

• Create a laughing board.

 

• Post family photos of wild or crazy poses, such wearing a wig or a clown nose or anything else that’s fun.

 

• Clip entertaining words or jokes so they can be read.

 

• Post a little bit of a lot of humorous things.

 

• Practice tongue twisters.

 

“Parenthood is just the world’s most intensive course

in love.  Yet we are not becoming parents to give or

get love.  Rather we are to discover love as a fact of

life and the truth of being.“

Polly Berrien Berends

 

Jeanine Fitzgerald
Owner, The Fitzgerald Institute Of Lifelong Learning.